Infinite Shades of Blue

What a great privilege it has been this past year in opening up.  After this month, a new chapter begins in my life and new Doors to be Opened.  I wasn’t sure how I was going to close this moment out but I recently heard someone joking about the movie flop of 50 Shades of Grey.   I knew I wanted to discuss a little about Infinity and the Blue (Energy).  For the past couple of months I have had 616 on the brain and didn’t know why until now.  Instead of the 20th of the month, this blog ends on the 16th.  Who knows with these things.

In 1992, shortly after I joined the Marines, I got my first tattoo.  The other guys I went with were out of their mind gung-ho oorah and wanting everything from a big giant eagle, globe, and anchor, to an M16 toting Tasmanian Devil with USMC written underneath.  I just wasn’t feeling it.  It needed to mean something…More.  Something discrete.  There it was.  The yin-yang.  The size of a quarter placed on my left shoulder.  What I had no idea was that in doing that, I sent myself on a path of trying to achieve balance for the next 20 years.  Never quite getting there.  One step forward.  Three steps back.  In 2013, I finally achieved it.  Balance.  To make a long story shorter, after eight months another Shift happened.  It was like a drumbeat in my head.  No matter what, I couldn’t shake it.  The Infinity symbol.  I Knew I had to put it on me.  I just didn’t know why and why it had to be a particular shade of blue…a blending of blues…not quite teal, not quite aquamarine……Something Bluish.  I knew it was going to compliment the yin-yang on my left shoulder by going on my right.  I’m not much of a tattoo guy as I’m more partial to the Richie Cunningham side of life so I figured I would just go to the mall to get it done.  I went and they were packed, so I strolled over to my magical synchronistic store, Romancing the Stone (I think I mentioned in the Jane blog).  One of the regular girls that worked there came walking up right away with a big smile, greeted me, and was like, Guess what!?!, I got a new tattoo!  Pointed down to her foot…the infinity symbol with the word love in it.  I laughed and pulled the picture out of my pocket of the tattoo likeness I was looking to get for myself.  It was her turn to laugh.  I never mentioned anything about getting an infinity tattoo before.  The other girl working there came over as well and filled her in on the “synchronistic moment”.  She asked me where I was going to get it done and when I said here at the mall she adamantly shook her head No.  She has a lot of tats.  She told me to go to Shine On and ask for Frank.  I did.  He began to apply the blue and said he was adding his own blue touch to it…I was like…Perfect.  I felt as though the Universe was working through him for exactly what I needed.

It was five months ago when it really fully hit me.  The Resonance.  I wrote that several months ago about the seemingly magical effect on water with verbal affirmations, music, and written words.  It was five months ago that I had to visit a Soldier in the hospital who had been diagnosed with Lymphoma.  I only had a few minutes with him in that initial encounter but I saw something that gave me one of my biggest Aha Moments in a while.  He raised his left arm to grab something and I saw his tattoo.  Inside of the left bicep, one word.  HATE.  Fat letters, and the deepest black color you can imagine.  Fresh.  Brand new.  19 years old and did not make it through his 7th week of basic training.  This cancer apparently came very fast, virtually out of nowhere.  The Aha Moment rang through though.  Immediately.

Messages to Water.  Us.  Symbols and words placed on our water sac bodies.  The body’s response.  My struggle for balance for 20yrs until I finally Pushed Through.  The profound Infinite Balance in my Life.  The Messages I gave to the Physical Body and the Body responding in kind to those symbols.

The cancer ravaging a young man’s body after sending the message of hate coursing through him.  How else could the body respond to something so vile, so ugly…How else?

Why Blue.  We’ll make that a statement and not a question.  It’s funny.  I actually cannot be too specific on that.  Even though I have Opened Up here in this Safe Haven forum of words, there are some things that I need to keep close to the vest.  I can say that the Blue is a part of Me.  Surrounds me.  Works with and through me.  Infinitely.

Someday.  Someday when this mortal shell fades away…My Eyes Will Open Once Again.

Live in the Light, My Friends.

BenGi, a Guardian

Ebra Kidbara

To Serve

Recently I had to write this for my school that I am beginning in the near future.  The Voice in my head instructed me that this will be fitting for our second to last entry before moving on with our/my Life.

Reasons Why I Serve My Country

The reasons why I serve my country basically come down to what the five year old version of me wanted to be when he grew up.  I wanted to be a fireman.  The basis of the thought behind this was to save and protect people, and not to just ride around in a big red truck.  I grew up in a family where the last period in which anyone served was WWII.  My grandmother told me about how guilty my grandfather felt about not being able to follow suit with his brother-in-laws serving in the Army.  He had been disqualified due to having rheumatic fever as a child.  There was nothing that really struck me while growing up that the military was my calling.  I just knew that I had great uncles that served, and a grandfather who was unable to.

Years later, a target of opportunity arose virtually out of nowhere.  What turned from a prank being played on my step-father from one of his friends, became a pivotal change in my life.  Someone had signed my step-father up for the Marines.  A packet of information was delivered, he laughed it off, and I picked it up.  It’s hard to describe the feeling now that it has been 23 years, but something shifted inside me.  I wanted this.  It was the perfect fit for me.  However, life has a funny way of shaping our destiny and my former spouse figured that our life would be much better if I were not serving in the Marines.  I compromised and left service in pursuit of a bachelor’s degree in History.

Eventually the brief tributary stream I was on corrected its course back into the main river.  I was once again back in alignment with myself, but this time as an Army officer.  The Army did not turn out to be a good fit for my former spouse.  The death of my mother and the divorce from my wife in such a short time span did not work well with me either.  I found a new branch in the river as I continued my journey in the civilian world for a second time.  Once again I was drifting away from my true nature.  I am very fortunate that branches and tributaries can always find their way back to the true source of the flow.

I had the tremendous opportunity to instruct marksmanship to Marines serving in Security Forces.  I watched children in Afghanistan play with rocks for toys, having a blast, and thinking about the life of American children in comparison.  I played a minor role of a much larger picture with the Sons of Iraq.  There are so many things that I can look back on with a sense of pride and fulfillment.  However, after 23 years, I do not have a sense of things winding down.  I feel like I am just getting started.   I am just getting started.

Another shift occurred two and a half years ago in my life.  A profound shift in nurturing the development of mind, body, and spirit had commenced.  When you change the way you eat, then you will change the way you think.  You will change the way you feel.  My feelings for service were profoundly changed.  When I began to develop the best parts of myself I realized that my commitment to the Army intensified.  I began to see something else in me.  I became a better leader, and after six months of this shift, my senior leadership saw it as well.  I received a second command so far removed from the flag pole, and big Army oversight, that the level of responsibility to be the best, even more so increased.  Another by-product of becoming your best version is that everyone around you is affected by a positive work climate.  The shift in my life is still at work and propelling me forward.  There is no going back downward again.

Serving in the Army is not about the paycheck.  It is not for the action, thrills, or travel to exotic lands.  I serve my country to honor my family, and out of respect for the ones who have served in the past.  I serve the Army to create the most positive experience that Soldiers can possibly have, and point out the best parts of themselves while I’m doing it.  I serve the people of the United States because they deserve to have the best leaders in care of their sons and daughters.  Most of all though, I honor the five year old version of me, and I am a guardian of this nation for him.

Mirrors

22 April Update:  Huh.  Weird.  Generally I never update anything and rarely do the hindsight thing.  Apparently, Just For Today, I am doing just that.  It occurred to me on the run this morning to make this update.  To express the Idea that this IS possible if you can clean the gunk off your Mirror.  Not just clean the gunk off, but more…Polish the Mirror.  Polish it so fresh, so shiny, that you can finally see You and All Possibilities of You.

Polish your Mirror, my Friend.  22 April Update Complete___________________

Almost a year ago I had a Feeling.  A feeling that every choice I make is the right one.  No matter if it even has the appearance of a poor choice.  Something started to form in my Mind and Heart that the choices I was making (from now on) were for the Highest Possible Good.  I mean…after the Shift, I felt the whole Mirroring Effect of what I send out Energetically comes right back to me.  Basic Law of Attraction physics stuff.  To put it plainly, good thoughts reflect back good things coming into your life as well as the reverse effect as well.  I’m going to try and get this out of me the best I can and hopefully make sane enough sense for the apparent crazy notion.

The Thoughts and Feelings came to me about the Infinite possible futures that lay ahead of me.  Every one of those possible futures depending upon every single action I create in the present moment.  It’s almost as if the Present Version of Me is continuously sending out a signal and I am continuously receiving reflections from all the possible future outcomes and as I am in tune with my Higher-Self, am able to discern which choice I should make…….without thought, or rather over-thinking, just a DO-ing.  So the present Me, the one living in Harmony with Self, is out to create the best possible future for not just me, but for All Beings.  Everyone and Everything.

So art really is not my forte.  I drew the cover photo on my office white board when the Idea/Feeling was building a year ago.  It’s a really vague depiction.  My apologies for any who are so inclined to care at the gravity of my poor imagery.  One thing (an infinite thing, hah), is that you only see the One possible hallway of mirrors so to speak as opposed to the infinite possible number of mirrors which would be incredibly difficult considering my artistic skill level.  Another is that I break it down to one day, one week, one month, three months, etcetera.  In Reality it would be a reflection of every instant from every possible future reflecting back to me and up to me to choose…without thinking.  I know.  Crazy.  How to make sense of something like that.  A statement.  Not a question.  You don’t.  You can’t.  Just Do.  And Know with Full Faith and Confidence that all you do is for the Highest Good in the Universe as long as you are living in Harmony with your Highest-Self.

Tending My Garden

Ok I admit it.  I use analogies way too much.  However, this was truly the first that I used.  The Garden.  I am the Garden.  Five months into the Shift, May 2013, this became the first analogy.  Through my Inner Journey I had found the Optimist Creed by Christian D. Larson, which eventually led me to his book in which the Optimist Creed begins with, Your Forces and How to Use Them.  Then as I began to continue my tumble down the rabbit hole, a whole world/Universe of Christian D. Larson began to manifest in my life, namely The Pathway of Roses (among many others now).  That book took me to a place I was not expecting, and as I have found over and over again, things in life just unfold and blossom as they were intended to.  In my Mind, Body, and Spirit, I became like a flower garden where the sun is always shining.  It just needed tending to.  Not every now and then.  DAILY.  It is so important (for me, and would like to think for everyone) to start each day off perfectly.  Wake up with a smile and grateful to start anew.  And in the spirit of keeping the perfect morning going, I had to tend my Garden daily.  What do you do for a garden.  Give it plenty of water (preferably not tap or bottled), enrich the soil with just the right nutrients, plenty of sunshine, talk to it/give it Love, and oh so so important… to pull the weeds.  Daily.  For me this is starting the day with expressions of Gratitude to the Universe/God.  Prayer, affirmations, prayer, meditation.  You have to pull the weeds EVERY DAY.  They will creep back in and grow before you know it.  So I will open myself up a little more than I usually do and put down here my beginning prayer that I say every morning from The Pathway of Roses: To live always in the Secret Places of the Most High. To think only those thoughts that are inspired from above, To do all things in the conviction that God is with us, To give the best to all the world with no thought of reward. To leave all recompense to Him who doeth all things well. To love everybody as God loves us, and be Kind as He is Kind, To ask God for everything and in faith expect everything, To live in perpetual gratitude to Him who gives everything. To love God so much that we can inwardly feel that My Father and I are one. This is the prayer without ceasing, the true worship of the soul. I guess it’s fitting that I started publishing only on the 20th of each month and this 20th happens to coincidentally fall on the Spring Equinox.  Lots of crazy cool energy out there my friends.  Be safe, think positive.  Always.

Jane

So I would like to introduce……….Jane…and how I came to believe in the whole psychic/medium world as a Fact and not a foo foo. Back in May 2013, I am doing my “work” (allowing the Universe to guide me) for the weekend and go to the mall at this one hippie type store, Romancing the Stone (lotsa stories and synchronicities here at this place, but will stick to Jane).  So I end up getting this really cool salt stone lamp, and they are buy one get another 50% off type deal.  The “other” does not have to be the same item but similar in price.  So it didn’t take me long and grabbed this GIANT painting of an ocean wave (Japanese).  I was like there is no way this is going in my place (I already had all the walls filled with paintings etc) and the Voice (in my head), GET IT.  So I got it.  Went to see my masseuse for some healing hands after leaving the mall and she was talking and talking and mentioned something about a local psychic/medium who did this group session and how she (this lady) singled out a friend of hers who was not even supposed to be there but happened to show up etc.  The Voice was like, Yes you must explore this.  I was like……….Ok.  So I asked her about the psychic, and she couldn’t remember her name but she had friended her FB page and we would check it after the session.  We both forgot.  Later that night when I remembered, I did a search and this lady, Jane, was the only one that stood out in my local area (small city).  Didn’t want to go any kind of FB route (done with FB) but she had a website as well.  I sent her an email and found she wrote me back when I awoke the next morning, Sunday.  After my Sunday morning “work” (prayer, meditation, affirmation/juicing/backwards planning my meals for the week) was done, I called her.  Ended up going to see her THAT day at 6pm.  I knew I would.  So I had this thought in my head after I got off the phone with her.  If she says something about this one thing that NO ONE knows about that I kept to myself then she is the REAL DEAL.  So I get to her place and she apologized as she just moved in.  Like literally a couple days ago.  So we start talking and hitting things off on a positive note. I had no idea why I was really there, just going with the Flow, and I explained what had been happening to me (the Shift etc).  So we are just going to do this tarot card reading and see where we end up, and then IT HAPPENED.  She looks up and says, “What’s wrong with your knee?”.  I started laughing, my mind was glowing pleasant flames, and pointed at her and said, “Oh yeah, You’re Good” haha.  My knee has (HAD!) been injured since the Army Marathon a month prior, I told her.  I just never made a big deal out of it.  I was Mr Positive now.  Keeping my runs to not much over three miles worked out well, but going over that, I can experience what would be something that was not pleasant, but it went away as soon as I stopped running.  She told me that it wasn’t my pain and to “let it go”.  She first mentioned very briefly at that time about being an empath but I just didn’t really let it sink in.  So I told myself though…not my pain.  Got it.  By next Saturday, on what used to be my long run, my knee was……….Healed.  I just didn’t know it yet.  The Voice said run farther.  I did.  I was Fine.  Mind blown.  Not done though.  She identified a few other significant things but this is already going to be a book enough, best to hit the highlights.  I spoke of my triathlon training and how swimming was my hardest event [My Arm] and then she spoke about how much she LOVED the water and had this affinity for the ocean and it was here where I started to feel a stirring.  I was intrigued and she gave me her business card (ocean waves) and I was like ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……an Aha moment………”I have something that belongs to you, and by the look of things, you are starting off with a clean slate…”  Her walls were bare.  So I told her about the painting, and later that night I emailed her a pic of it.  She didn’t know what to say.  I think she did, but she was holding back haha.  You CANNOT PLAN on something like that!  I got that painting BEFORE I even knew that my Higher Self was going to direct me to her with my masseuse convo!  You know?  So back to a little more psychic-ness.  In the tarot reading, she saw a dark haired woman with her head slightly turned, it was a powerful image she said.  The tarot card was a beautiful angel but I forget the word that was on it.  And for myself, I am trying to take it all in.  And then something hit me.  The painting in my bedroom above my bed.  The one that struck me so many months ago and I didn’t know what to do with it until the Shift in my life took place.  I showed it to her but it didn’t strike any bells.  Later on, after we were finished, I was getting ready to leave and something made me want to show her a picture of my grandmother.  She had mentioned THEM earlier when I first arrived, but we were not doing a “medium” reading.  They came in shortly after me, and asked me, who the ladies were?  My mom and grandma I told her…..Wow………she said my grandmother has a very powerful presence, not to take away from my mom’s power and love, BUT she IS my mom’s mom haha.  I felt compelled to SHOW her this pic that I took weeks earlier (on my phone) of her high school graduation picture.  And then it ALL started to make sense…  She looks at me and says, that’s her!  The woman that was slightly looking away she saw earlier.  And then the Voice was like look at your bedroom again (my picture on my phone)……….  In that moment, I realized that the way the painting was, the location of it in my room…it wasn’t a picture of a beautiful woman looking away, it is a picture of a Beautiful Woman watching over me.  My Grandmother.  On my way driving home leaving Jane’s, I had an Experience.  We’ll leave it at that.  Goes beyond description typing will allow.  I was not done with Jane though.  I made an appointment to come back, for one, to deliver a painting that didn’t belong to me, and another as I was curious about a couple things…My mom and grandma.  Before this psychic reading, I had a picture blown up in a frame in my office of my grandma, and I would stare at her, into her eyes and think how cool she looked, and what was going on with her then, she must have had dreams for the future.  I mean not to make light of the life she made, marriage and kids, but staring at the girl who graduated high school.  Her Dreams………My mom.  I always knew there was something WRONG between her and my uncle (her only brother).  Something HAPPENED, and I never knew what.  These are the types of things I was looking for from Jane and found.  I didn’t even have to ask the questions to Jane.  She started for me.  Ruth, my grandma, wanted to be a dancer, like classical dancing…ballet.  She just was living in the wrong time and place.  Never regretted her life though, loved her husband, her family.  Jean, my mom, had what I can imagine a terrifying experience as a young girl.  My uncle and his friend sneaking into her room at night.  Stressed she was not raped, but more than likely touched inappropriately.  In the moment of the reading I got the feeling we were not talking about just a one-time incident but the FEELING was this happened probably several times.  Did not want me to be mad at him.  So.  Now I know.  I also Know that they are with me and when I used to “joke” about always being good because my grandma and mom were watching over my shoulder………………..it was not a joke after all. I went to Las Vegas for the first time in August 2013 with my best friend, O (Army Captain who just came home from her second deployment), virtually my only friend, and Soul Sister.  Six years now since we became friends in Germany and the friendship/bond continues.  So Vegas……….a LOT DID HAPPEN there BUT this was on the plane ride back.  I met someone.  A Connection was made (LONG story there).  The next day I was………..a wreck of sorts.  SOMETHING happened.  I was in this constant state of euphoria and sadness.  I couldn’t shake it!!!  So happy!  So sad!!!!!  At the same time!  After Vegas I flew to Georgia where O is stationed and I just couldn’t snap out of it.  She had never seen me like this before.  Heck!  I had never seen me like this!  Why am I feeling this!!?!?!  I had all kinds of thoughts and notions, which the core of it was…Did I meet my Soul Mate?!?!  Later that night the Voice said It’s OK, you will feel better tomorrow, and I did, still with strong lingering effects of………whatever that was.  We were walking down a street in Savanna when we saw a psychic/medium store and she was like, “Dude, let’s go in!  You’re into that sh*t!”  By this point in time, O knew everything that had been happening to me.  I was UNEASY about going in to see another psychic, and was like…”Maybe…..let’s walk more and we’ll see on our way back…”.  A little further down the road I get a text……..from JANE!  I’m like, “What the hell?!?!?”.  She NEVER texted me before.  She wanted me to know that she was going to be out of town and if I needed a reading it would have to be tomorrow………..Ok Jane.  You’re SPOOKY, I got you haha.  We did not go back.  I got home and sent her (Jane) an email, did not say anything about my experience.  I knew that I needed to see her though.  It was a couple weeks later that I finally got her.  I waited for it.  SHE brought up the girl in question.  She said, did you meet a woman recently?  Inside I am smiling, she is so good.  Yes, I did.  DO NOT TRUST HER.  I’m like, say what?  She has mental problems.  Like severe depression type of stuff.  And then………..I told her the story.  She just looked at me and gave me that Duh, you didn’t know(?) type expression and said very plainly, matter of fact(ly)…you’re an Empath, and your Third Eye….is Open.  Be careful etc etc.  So my mind is trying to digest this…I’m an empath (didn’t she tell me this before?).  Like I had an idea about an empath…feeling other people’s emotions and feelings, putting yourself in their place etc etc, plus a form of strong intuition that goes along with this gift.  So that CONNECTION I made with this girl really kicked in on the plane when she mentioned something to me that really garnered my FULL attention.  She told me about her twin sister who had died when she was 18.  20yrs ago.  And days away from the anniversary of her death.  She didn’t get to the HOW, and I didn’t press, but she felt a LOT of guilt about her death.  So…………the Connection.  Contact Made.  It wasn’t me.  It was her.  I took it in.  Those feelings……….unbelievable.   We were emailing/texting/a couple of phone calls for a while, just over a couple months, and eventually I told her what Jane said to me.  Her very first words were, “That bitch!”  I was stunned and then she laughed it off.  She admitted to me though that she was on medication for manic depressive…I was like, in my mind, Wow, makes sense then.  Eventually I let it go and let her go.  I do remember the point of contact on the airplane and had to refrain from expressing any type of surprise when I saw IT, but when I was staring at her it was like water and then a ripple effect or something that I called the warble effect around her face (just in front of?).  This warbling was by far one of the most bizarre things I had ever encountered. Eventually I moved to Texas, far and away from Jane, but it didn’t end.  Eventually we ended up doing some Skype sessions which were really cool.  Each time we did it, we would have a “visitor” try and speak through the microphone.  Could never make out what they were trying to say.  You know?  That white noise stuff?  Weird.  Anyway, there was one fundamental thing that Jane could not fully do, or more rather on a limited scope.  She really couldn’t tell me my future.  Some things she was a lock on, like Vegas (immediate future).  I do remember in a session she said, “Are you going on a trip next week where you might win a lot of money?”.  Bam.  On it, Jane.  She told me that I was going to win, but she really couldn’t say WHAT I would win………….So it’s been a while after that trip.  Did I win?  Yes.  I won Awareness, or rather, More Awareness of Who I Am.  I remember reading or watching a youtube clip and something about psychics really do not like to try and predict the future as it seems to have a way of…changing.  Like when we were Skyping almost one year ago this month for the first time since I had left and she said, “Oh!  You’re thinking about getting a kitten!”  All over it, Jane!  Yes!  I even had a kitten calendar to plant the seed further, BUT I was just waiting for more signs, and the kitten never entered my life.  The main thing with Jane was that she was able to tell me about things that recently happened to me, within a week, a couple days, or was currently in progress of happening, and then the sometimes the “what will happen” if it was a fixed event that was immutable(?) or unlikely to change…….in the very near future. So now I’m going to end this way too long and over the top blog entry with something that just happened this past weekend.  Something ALWAYS happens in my life these days, some weirder than others, but this one was a bit strange………and nothing to do with the subject title of “Jane” haha.  You know……..this blog entry was supposed to be easy!  I was going to write some stuff about Proactive living as opposed to Reactive……..but then I was guided to do this impromptu Jane bit…….and my bit. I had my alarm set for 0313 this past Sunday (I was in bed by 7 Sat night haha ) and it went off just fine, but I had this really incredible dream that I was just lying there trying to figure out what happened…My head ached.  Not A “headache” but the left front part of my brain just was like I dunno like a dull thud…..now the Voice in my head was like **yaaawn**, You know what’s going to happen if you just lay here trying to go over your dream….your gonna fall asleep, BUT I was like, Yes, I know, and if I do then I am sure I will wake up soon…I was getting close, it was like almost an “Aha” and “No Sh*t” moment…….BUT THEN three minutes later (0316)!  ***ring ring!!!***  Did I fall asleep?  My phone?  Ringing?  A late night prankster?  No!  My First Sergeant!  I THINK I may have dosed off a little and felt like I was so close to figuring something out but I instantly woke up completely (MUST be an EMERGENCY! Soldier in the hospital, SOMETHING!) and forgot about trying to go over the dream immediately………. Me: Yes!?!?  1SG!?!  My alarm just went off right before you called, what a “coincidence”!  (I could hear some rustling noise, some mumbling voice…) 1SG!?!  1SG!?!?!?  Is everything Ok?!? 1SG:  (groggy voice) Sir?  I think I must have accidently ghost dialed you……..(very groggy) Me: (excited because he wasn’t calling because of a Soldier being hurt!)    1SG!  This is perfect timing!  Look, put me on speaker phone and we can start one of my Super Soul Sundays together! He laughed, mumbled he would see me on Tuesday (Holiday Monday).  Accidently ghost dialed me?  Really.   You know I have long left the idea of chance, coincidence, and accidents far behind.  They do not exist in my world.  Soooooooooo somehow, the Universe found a way to not only get my ass up and moving but………….I had completely forgotten that dream.  I cannot remember one tiny part of it, and it was a DOOZY.  I was however left with this dull achey head throb for several hours afterward though. So I remembered to bring it up at work on Tuesday and he laughed.  “Crazy, sir!”  I’m like yeah crazy.  So explain to me how you managed to enter your four digit passcode and accidently ghost dial me.  Two phones sitting on his night stand.  Gov’t IPhone and his personal IPhone………reached over in his sleep, punched in his code, called me until he could hear me shouting on the other end where he started to “snap out of it”.  He has no idea. Crazy?  Interesting.  Something happened Saturday night/Sunday morning in my dream world and even as I type this I remember what the Voice said earlier in the week……..Forget about it. It’s almost like, someone was whispering to 1SG to call me, sleep makes us very susceptible to the power of suggestion………interesting stuff.  Anyway, yeah I know, crazy, why are you getting up at three in the morning on Sunday?  Yeah.  Hah.  Actually?  That is “sleeping in” on the weekends for me…by two hours haha. So!  My apologies for this out of the ordinary entry!  For whatever reason in the Universe, I am dropping this pebble and creating a ripple effect……..as in All Things We Do.  I’ll probably go the route of how I tend my Garden next time (which is Me).  Only four more entries left and then……….We move on 😉

Jag

It’s truly amazing how well people take care of their cars.  I used to
really care of mine as well.  Wash’er up at least once or twice a month, put
that shine on, show’er off.  Now I just cruise around in my scuffed up
silver Focus.  I like how it’s scuffed up.  After the Shift, the Focus had
an unfortunate incident where one of my neighbors must have decided that
backing up into my left (driver’s) side rear fender/bumper area was a good
idea.  Got her pretty good.  Instead of getting mad, I went another way.  I
decided to like it.  It was like me now.  Focused and scuffed up.  The Shift
had focused me, life had scarred me.  Long story, unnecessary here but my
left upper arm looks like I may have been bit by a shark (with some retained
titanium hardware to boot hah).  So for the past couple years I had thought
of myself and my car as reflections of one another (of sorts).  A couple
months ago I was thinking about THE main vehicle though.  Me.  I Drive Me.
Through the Shift I took the necessary steps to come into harmony with my
three aspects of Self.  I ingest only the most effective and efficient
Superfoods.  I take him on long drives (running) and conduct other levels of
vehicle maintenance and conditioning (strength training).  The computer
systems gets regular calibration tweaks (Lumosity, binaural beats,
affirmations).  The best thing I like most about my vehicle is.I love him.
Taking my time, waxing the surface, it is so clear that I see something
tremendously fundamental.  I see Me.  I see me looking at Me (daily
meditation).
So one early morning waking up for work (around 0115ish), I heard the Voice.
He (Me) said, you (I) are (am) a Jaguar.  In general as it is I have a
cat-like personality.  I believe it was picked up by the cat I had in my
early developing years and as an empath, I may have taken on some of those
traits, but anyway, neither here nor there in this instance.  I received the
word, the word was I Am the Jaguar.  Not the cat.  The car (the body
vehicle) that I drive.  Later at work I found a picture online that I
printed out to have on the wall to remind myself that I am the Jaguar.  It
was silver and a convertible, very sleek.  I think it may have lasted a
couple days on the wall until I was reading about something and saw “black
jaguar”, knew in an instant I needed to change the picture.  As I am typing
this out (I love how the Universe continuously unveils things before me), I
just realized something.  The cat that I grew up with that had such a
profound effect on me from early childhood, George.  She was an all-black
cat.  I Am the Jaguar, and my engine purrs.

The Chicken or The Egg

So I was on the run one morning about a month ago and had this Thought about how grateful I was for the air filling my lungs and bringing me Life. In that spirit of Gratitude, my thoughts began to shift towards giving and receiving. Breathing out, breathing in and so on and so on. I further began to contemplate the life I once new as a person that was resistant to receive. Gifts, love, whatever. Giving was my thing. I was The Giver. With the Shift though and Letting Go, I allowed receiving back into my life. My thought Stream on the run continued with…..hmmmmmmm Giving and Receiving. What came first? The whole chicken or the egg thing. However, it came to me quickly. At least from my perspective, in this 3D physicality, it was Receiving. We come out of our little cocoon from our mother’s womb and the very first thing is that rush of air filling those tiny lungs with our very first Gift and us acting in kind by letting that air out and Giving back to the Universe.

The perpetual cycle began with Receiving that first breath……..We breathe in Universes that give us life and we transform/transmute those Universes and give them back to any and all who need it…..trees, flowers, the very grass under our feet…..

The Season of Receiving and Giving is not just about Christmas or the Holidays. It is the Essence of every moment.

With Love and Gratitude to All and a Very Safe and Merry Christmas,

The Receiver and The Giver